Mr. Mud Butt

Posted on August 26, 2011

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On my day off a relatively attractive man with beautiful teeth came in to sell. He had all the ideal things we are looking for in menswear. Plaid button up shirts, cool euro sneakers, and Levis jeans. He also had a capital sin we dread looking for, a “soiled” crotch in a perfect pair of jeans. Now as you can probably understand this is very common in women’s jeans. this is the first I’ve heard with mens. Mens jeans are usually smell completely foul because for some reason men think jeans never need to be washed, the back hem is usually frayed because men don’t tend to get them hemmed, but really that’s the extent of problems I’ve had with mens jeans. This “soil” wasn’t so much a “soil” as it was actual grown man shit that looked like the melted candy bars you put in diapers for that baby shower game where you guess which candy bar it is. So the next day I’m buying and in walks this man…WITH the jeans. Cherise told him to wash them and bring them back but I guess she didn’t think he would. SS told briefly tells me the jeans we dirty yesterday so we didn’t take them. Of course its his turn to sell 5 mins later and he gets me as his buyer. He waltzes up to the counter all smiles tells Cherise he washed the jeans and starts holding a conversation about how he thinks Beyonce is into Illuminati listing the reasons why. ‘Okay’ I think ‘He washed them’. I bought them. Didn’t even think about where the term “shit STAIN” came from. PASS!!!!!!!