Oh No She Di’n’t

Posted on October 4, 2011


After 9 years of retail  I see the humor in almost every situation. This started out as one of those situations and quickly turned into me wanting to take off my earrings and throw down like 6th grade after school at the flag pole.  I was at the buying counter when 3 women walked in the side door. Soso greeted them but they were  SO loud they couldn’t hear her to respond. They stayed and shopped a good hour and a half cackling like hens *http://hens.urbanup.com/4715407*  saying how ugly things were, how you could get the same thing at TJ Maxx until they finally settled on a “Ooh that’s hellllllla cute, but it would look better on me”. They ended up finding 37 1/2  items that were sufficient before heading up to the cashier. *Just a sidebar, please decide on your items BEFORE you get in line. NO ONE wants to stand behind you in line while you decide between 37   items only to find that you are actually only buying 2 of them* The hens took 15-20 mins to decide which items they wanted while people waited in line behind them. Saint Patti came to help speed along the process by taking sensors off of  items they were sure they wanted. Senorita Verde was ringing them up when one of the women passes her money to her friend instead of Senorita Verde.

Hen #1: “Oops, what am I doin’? I should be giving my money to that bitch” she says while pointing at Senorita Verde.

Huh? I chuckle.

It is posted near our registers that if you don’t take a bag we donate 5 cents to a charity of your choice. So Saint Patti asks if the women would like a bag.

Hen #2: “What chu mean? How the hell else am I suppose to carry it?”

I chuckle again and shake my head. I look at SoSo who’s already staring at me with raised eyebrows. I look at Saint Patti praying that she is about to get a little unholy, but it didn’t happen. I can’t help but laugh out loud. She really just said that.

Hen #3:  “Wow, she look real happy over there. You happy huh?” she says to me.

Me: “Yeah, I am”

Hen#1: “Something must be funny”

Hen#2: “Yeah real funny, whats so funny?”

Me: “You. That WHOLE situation was just funny to me”

The hens exchange looks, while me and Soso telepathically tell each other it may be “on and crackin” in a second. We all wait on edge.

Hen#1: “…yeah… I guess that was funny huh?” she says as she shrugs her shoulders.

Me: “Yep, hilarious. Have a good day”

Hen#1: “Yeah you too”

I swear…pass.